Would you be horrified or angry if I tell you that
in a recent television interview where Stone Phillips interviewed
Jeffrey Dahmer in prison a few years ago, the serial criminal
and psychopath was referred to as “very shy” as
a child by his parents? Theodore Kazynski the “Unibomber” of
years ago used to run up to his room and hide as a child
when he heard visitors drive their car into his parents’ driveway.
In both these cases, characteristics of social anxiety and
social avoidance evolved into some pretty serious psychiatric
conditions!
There is indeed a definite profile of adolescents
who have acted out with school violence in the last decade.
These individuals where not socially well adjusted with
quality peer relationships. They tended to be loners or
hung out with other loners. In addition, they were at the
lower end of the social “pecking order” and
were often picked on by others, developing internal rage
over time and eventually exploding!
One of my patients recently brought me a movie to
watch: “FIGHT CLUB”. It was very interesting.
A cult of men took out their anger on the unfairness of
society. Their strength and power were based on the dynamic
of self- inflicted pain. My patient, a 20-year-old who
had experienced substantial social rejection and “put
down” gave himself a black eye - self-administered
pain - to create a sense of power!
Countless numbers of my socially avoidant teens
and young adults have verbalized to me that they “understand
why kids shot others” - as in the epidemic of school
violence.
Most individuals with anger and rage resulting from
social anxiety implode, meaning their anger is internalized
and repressed. This recycled energy turns into a myriad
of problems as the anger drives depression, anxiety, obsessiveness,
and a myriad of stress-related disorders. People develop
anger when they avoid situations they don’t want
to be avoiding, or know they shouldn’t be avoiding.
Any patient of any age and functioning level who
has achieved therapeutic success with me has learned to
identify and channel the energy of their anger productively.
In fact, believe it or not, panic and anxiety attacks are
a somatic (physical) expression of emotion - primarily anger.
This is after medical-physical etiology has been ruled
out.
Take a few minutes and listen
to Eric describe
his anger during his therapeutic process.
The earlier there is productive intervention,
the more of a chance there is to resolve anger, which can
be very structural-deep, before it works it’s way
insidiously into the personality.
Berent Associates
17 Maple Drive, Great Neck, NY 11021
Tel: (800) 248-2034 Fax: (516) 487-7414
E-mail: info@socialanxiety.com
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