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Blushing and social anxiety progressed so much I isolate myself.

Asked By: Anonymous     Views: 1,548 times

Your "map" for healing (if you choose to go there) requires you to learn how to make friends with your adrenaline (which is what drives the blushing). In order to accomplish this, a very important thing you need to do is to be clear on how you learned your negative association to adrenaline and blushing. These historically traumatic scenarios include accute levels of embarrassment, humiliation, shame, and loss of control associated with the blushing itself. In response to these you have learned a very defensive life position. In order to control anxiety one needs to learn a proactive strategy or gameplan.The more you invest in defense, the worse the problem will get. Medicine is a complex issue regarding blushing. If not used correctly it can worsen the problem. Consider "The Magic Trick" story. One patient, 20 years old, who had been suffering from blushing-social anxiety for many years was quite depressed because of his condition. One day in a college class where he was giving a presentation, He addressed the class with the words "in a minute you are going to see a magic trick. My face is going to change color". Guess what? He did not blush.Because he took himself out of a defensive position! This is a dramatic example of a proactive technique. I do appreciate the fact that you may not be able to afford therapy, but all the answers, strategies, technique etc are in the book "Work Makes Me Nervous: Overcome Anxiety and Develop the Confidence to Succeed". I very much identify with Carol, the cancer survivor and what she went through. My experience is very similar. All my life I have been very afraid of public speaking and had been very shy. But I consider that normal to what had started happening to me a year and a half ago. Over years my shyness decreased little by little, I was and am still somewhat shy but most people never noticed. But almost a year into a previous job, and going to school, I started experiencing social anxiety, only I didn't know what it was at the time. I lost my job months later. Which in turn my anxiety greatly excelled. My face turns bright red when I am center of attention, sometimes even in front of a single person. I sweat, my throat gets tight, I slightly shake. I basically feel on the verge of a panic attack even in very basic social situations such as going to the grocery store. And even though I am a pretty girl I feel my social anxiety is much stronger around young good looking men. I now isolate myself regularly because of the physical effects I experience. I am to scared and embarrassed to take the chance of one of my "freak outs" happening. I avoid accomplishing my goals and dreams out of sheer fear. I am 20 going on 21 this month and I urge to be a normal, functioning young women like I was not so long ago. Now I struggle trying to stay positive I find my self considering medicine which I before would refuse to except as a solution to my problem. I felt medication was masking my disorder not fixing it. I have lost my strength at this point. I feel like I lost so much hope, I feel rundown mentally. I can't imagine living much more of my life this way but I don't know what to do seeing as I can not afford therapy and barley even medication for that madder. I'm really unsure where my social anxiety stems from. I almost feel as if it hit me like a truck out of no where. All I know is I'm desperate for change and happiness!

Your "map" for healing (if you choose to go there) requires you to learn how to make friends with your adrenaline (which is what drives the blushing). In order to accomplish this, a very important thing you need to do is to be clear on how you learned your negative association to adrenaline and blushing. These historically traumatic scenarios include accute levels of embarrassment, humiliation, shame, and loss of control associated with the blushing itself. In response to these you have learned a very defensive life position. In order to control anxiety one needs to learn a proactive strategy or gameplan.The more you invest in defense, the worse the problem will get. Medicine is a complex issue regarding blushing. If not used correctly it can worsen the problem. Consider "The Magic Trick" story. One patient, 20 years old, who had been suffering from blushing-social anxiety for many years was quite depressed because of his condition. One day in a college class where he was giving a presentation, He addressed the class with the words "in a minute you are going to see a magic trick. My face is going to change color". Guess what? He did not blush.Because he took himself out of a defensive position! This is a dramatic example of a proactive technique. I do appreciate the fact that you may not be able to afford therapy, but all the answers, strategies, technique etc are in the book "Work Makes Me Nervous: Overcome Anxiety and Develop the Confidence to Succeed".

The following is part of a collection of questions and sharing by our readership community about a wide variety of aspects of social anxiety. Dive in and receive practical insights and advice. If you have a question that is not included you can contact Jonathan at jberent@socialanxiety.com.

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