Often people with Asperger’s have poor handwriting and repetitive movements that resemble obsessive-compulsive behavior. They can be easily upset when expectations are not met, or their routines disturbed. Sometimes they are unusually sensitive to sounds, smells, and touch.

One of my patients was a 15-year-old named Brad. He was quite attractive. He was a straight a student who studied about an hour a day. He spent approximately 75 hours a week on the computer playing one game. He hated gym and sports although he did OK in these activities when he tried. He hated group activities in and outside of school. Try to talk to him about socializing or feelings and this would elicit a response of anger or frustration. His independence skills were substantially retarded. For example, his parents had to wake him up every morning to go to school or he would miss the bus. Once in my office, he was asked to cross the street. He became anxious. He had to ask his father to help him cross the street… a 15-year-old, a straight a student, an average busy street.

His parents were accomplished professionals with their own obsessive characteristics. It was extremely difficult for them to facilitate an empowering parenting strategy because of their own anxiety. “What would happen if he was under too much stress?” his mother asked. I countered with “what will happen if he does not learn how to handle stress and become responsible?”

This disorder is understudied. There are very few clinical programs available to this population. Through the years, many people with Asperger’s have been in my social therapy program. I can assure you that social anxiety is a component of Asperger's. It is very important to understand this, in addition to parenting issues; as early as possible, in order for treatment to be productive.

Your Options

1. Free video of Sally Raphael Show featuring a number of patients with social anxiety and learning /developmental disabilities. ($10.95 postage in U.S. $19.95 outside U.S.)
2. Free social-ability questionnaire
3. Free "Parent Addiction" quiz
4. Free 17-step parenting methodology
5. Free Introductory CD
6. Comprehensive therapy in Great Neck, New York
7. Parenting therapy via telephone
8. "Social Therapy and the Learning Disabled: A 2 1/2 hour seminar on audio tape. (For parents)
9. The book, "Beyond Shyness: How to Conquer Social Anxieties" (Simon & Schuster)
10. The Friendship Connection: socialization program for teenagers and adults with learning disabilities and developmental challenges
11. Subscribe to the Tip of the Month Club